me and music, today

About five years ago I did a meditation connecting myself with the universe and look into the future. To dream my own unfolding. The insights were 1) yes, I wanted to be a mother. 2) I wanted to purchase a Zimbabwean style marimba.

Talking to other parents, it was clear that having a child would change everything and that it was a glorious, messy, tiring path. The little one is four now and is such a bright light, and yes, some work 🙂

Purchasing the marimba seemed like much less of a world-changer. But one marimba led to two, and two led to seven, and seven led to ten (+) and now I consider myself a musician where before I felt like a dabbling percussionist and I like that. I feel some clarity about my path that I did not used to have, and I like that too.

Currently, I’m in the middle of another self-imposed practice challenge: 30 minutes a day focused on deepening my relationship with music starting most days with active listening to a piece of recorded music. It’s good. Practice works. It doesn’t always work as fast as I’d like it to, and sometimes it reveals places that I was skimming over and tricking myself into thinking that I was better than I really am, which can be painful, but it really does work.

We’ve been in the recording studio with the marimbas for the past few months (did our first studio test nearly six months ago) and it’s neat (though sometimes intense) to see our debut album coming together. I am humbled by the process and have had to step up what I consider “being able to play something.” We’re recording the ensemble tracks in an open room without a click, so it requires some focus. That being said, I think that it will be a really good album and I’m a better player than I was six months ago.

In a process of seeing what a good second instrument might be for me, I just performed in the North Fork Community Choir last Sunday. Singing with a choir for the first time in 25 years was a really neat stretch for me and further opened me musically. It’s wonderful to be a part of a community that is inclusive as well as dedicated to making good music. And whether or not I fully take up vocal study, I know I’ll keep singing.

I’ve also been teaching marimba and really enjoying the process of helping other people claim and deepen their relationship to music, this Sunday we’ll focus on the 12/8 time-feel. I am also inspired to start offering women’s rhythm and drumming afternoons, I can feel that there is a potency to gathering as women, and I look forward to seeing what will unfold. Here’s a list of current events.

Another stretch is that David an I are offering our first sleep-away summercamp this summer! Marimba, Rhythm, and Music – outside Crawford at the foot of Black Mesa. The camp is geared for music enthusiasts grades 6 and up. Here’s the full details. We want folks who are excited to learn and be at the edge of the wilderness with no electronic devices. It’s going to be fun & immersive. I even have childcare lined up, whoop, whoop! We have a couple more spots and I’m curious who will fill out the ensemble. . .

“Perhaps more than any sense except smell, sound bypasses our rational mind to move us at a primal level.” Julia Cameron, Vein of Gold

Advertisements

day 4

practicing is making it easier to learn parts. yay.

this has been a weird sleep week, but glad to be playing regularly. and glad to know there are some folks out there taking me up on the practice challenge. yippee!

morning

It’s morning here. Cool. There were sprinkles of rain on the tarp over our tent in the night.

I notice a tenderness here in my heart. It seems like it might just be part of being human. There is so much beauty and so much sorrow in this world and all that adds up to a tender heart for me this morning.

I’ve been reading,”Finding Your Way in a Wild New World: Reclaim Your True Nature to Create the Life You Want” by Martha Beck. I highly recommend it. Instead of starting with what do you want? It starts with Wordlessness and Oneness. Teaching techniques for dropping out of the verbal mind and into the present moment and into our connection with all things. From there it asks the question – “what is wanting to move through you?” I like this version of “Creating the Life You Want” way better than some of the others people talk about. I am such a strong believer in the potency of Presence! Of course our vastness is more intelligent than our isolated personalities.

We’ve been experimenting with some of these techniques in the yoga class I’ve been teaching and that’s been lovely. I love the moving practice and dropping into the body. I love the possibility that unhelpful patterns could just melt away.

I’ve been attempting to bring more of this state into my gardening – realizing how I get caught in the “things to do,” which keeps me out of connection with with garden. It’s been sweet to slow down and offer more attention. Slow down and see what is wanting to happen next. Slow down and notice that one of the trees looks a bit wilty and be able to set a hose. Slow down and notice the miracles of flowers.

Asking the question – what would bring more joy for all beings? How can I play more? What brings me deep satisfaction and joy?

I’ll keep you posted. Today it is yoga class with Amy Williams at BIJA in Paonia – she’s so amazing. And perhaps some water somewhere. And some garden time. And some time for art.

And you?

carpet

so I’m convinced that I’m trying to learn something about asking the universe for things (manifestation, but that’s a charged word these days).

we needed carpet for the remodel. we put an ad in the paper. we go to pick up carpet number 1 which is very close to what I was imagining – after loading the carpet – the guy says, oh – by the way, I want $25 for it. I was startled and paid him, even though I didn’t really want to.

carpet #2 calls – I ask – and yes he wants money and even though it’s not exactly the color I was envisioning and it costs money – we decide to go for it, because at least then it will be over. we now have exactly as much carpet as we need.

carpet #3 calls – it’s exactly the color that I was envisioning and it’s free. so I get it. and now I have a bit of extra carpet, plus the carpet that I really want.

the moral of this story?

 

see.

there are several.

1) ask if the person offering carpet wants to sell it or is giving it away

2) don’t settle for less than what you really want, because with a bit of persistence you can actually have what you really want.

or) you can have what you really want only after you stop looking

or) too much carpet is better than too little carpet, because now I get to be generous – and I get to carpet the basement and David can cut it the perfect size and use it as a drum rug and why not?

or). . . ..  . . . .fill in the blank