a long fall

I have been recovering my strength and taking a few days of much-needed relaxation before jumping back in to school and work here at home.

And in that pause, David and I are reading The Fellowship of the Ring by J.R.R. Tolkien.  It is a fabulous story, and incredibly well written. Because it takes longer to read, I feel that there is more time to let the images and the metaphors seep into my soul and really feed the part of me that needs stories; especially stories where good triumphs over evil.

I continue to be troubled about the proposed lease-sale that is back on the books for Feb. 14, 2013. More info here: http://www.citizensforahealthycommunity.org/news/take-action-today-heres-how-to-fight-the-feb-2013-lease-sale

Also, it makes me question my use of resources and my participation in this culture. Currently I am a vegetarian and buy nearly all my food organically grown, preferably from local sources. And still, I drive my car, go on tour cross-country on RV’s, use the natural gas to cook my food, heat my house while I’m gone and fly to visit family in other states. These are privileges that I enjoy as a middle-class white American and I am aware of the use of resources that accompanies these decisions. I do feel the responsibility that rides with them, but justify my decisions by attempting to bring goodness, healing and light to the world through my actions and in the benefit I receive as a being by visiting other parts of the world.

Is it enough?

When I wrestle with this question I come back to the knowledge that I cannot know. I cannot know how my life touches the world. I cannot know how the music is received by the 1600 people in Austin, Minnesota and the others upon our travels. I cannot know what one choice to recycle makes, even if it would be easier to throw the bottles away.

When I venture into the world I see this – the culture is crazy and out of control, it is hard to make life-serving decisions.  As Bill Plotkin points to in his fabulous book Nature and the Human Soul, “. . . we live in a culture dominated by adolescent habits and desires, then the enduring societal changes we so desperately need won’t happen until we individually and collectively evolve into an engaged, authentic adulthood.” http://www.animas.org/newbook/default.htm

So here’s to evolution. Here’s to authentic adulthood. Here’s to listening to the wisdom of nature. Here’s to music. Here’s to our collective unfolding!

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One thought on “a long fall

  1. I love those books. 🙂

    And I can totally relate to the inner conflict you are experiencing. But all we can do is act with awareness and compassion. Do our best and have faith it will all work out.

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